“FRIEND, NO STRONGER WORDS CAN BE UTTERED THAN THOSE GOD SPOKE MORE THAN 2000 YEARS AGO WHEN HE VIEWED THE LIFE STYLES OF ANCIENT ISRAEL AND SAID, ‘I HATE DIVORCE!’”

 I’m Dennis Finnan, host and speaker on the World, the Word & You! Broadcast and in a moment we’ll talk about that hard saying found in the Bible…

… In all Scripture, perhaps there are no words more difficult and contested than what God has spoken concerning the marriage relationships of His human creation. From the Old Testament to the New, what God the Father has said, what Jesus said and the apostles who later followed said, of that there is certainly much confusion, and high emotions that surround the issue of marriage and divorce. In fact, this is an issue few preachers want to talk about let along preach on from the Word of God. However today, in keeping with our desire to touch on subjects often left out of Sunday pulpiteering, I’ll wade through these murky waters with you, to find out some truths about this “Hard Saying,” of God taken from the Book of Malachi. But first, let’s listen to this moment of music to prepare our hearts…

…That stark and ominous words the Bible says God the Father spoke to Israel long ago is the title of today’s message. This is taken from the Book of Malachi in regard to the living relationships of the people of Israel near the end of the Old Testament Revelation of God to mankind. Let me read it for you and comment and from there launch out in the difficult teaching that has permeated the world of Christianity these days. We read,

Mal 2:14-16 (NLT)  You cry out, “Why has the LORD abandoned us?” I’ll tell you why! Because the LORD witnessed the vows you and your wife made to each other on your wedding day when you were young. But you have been disloyal to her, though she remained your faithful companion, the wife of your marriage vows. 15 Didn’t the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard yourself; remain loyal to the wife of your youth. 16 “For I hate divorce!” says the LORD, the God of Israel. “It is as cruel as putting on a victim’s bloodstained coat,” says the LORD Almighty. “So guard yourself; always remain loyal to your wife.”

Scholar’s tells us the Hebrew text so translated here, is difficult at best. It appears the men of Israel had forsaken God in many ways. First, (1) spiritually by going after false gods (vv.11-12), second, (2) followed by polygamous or multiple religiously mixed marriages with heathen and godless women, and finally (3) The Israelite men had left their godly wives, and literally divorced them to remarry another.

In response to these triple sins of the spirit, heart and flesh, God told them – “I HATE DIVORCE!” We see here Malachi penned strong language, for God Himself showed His displeasure with such divorces. He said, I hate divorce. Hate (from Hebrew “śānē” ) means to detest and abhor something done. To underscore the point, the Bible says this statement was made by the LORD God of Israel Himself. This recalls the fact that He is the sovereign Lawgiver and Judge of all the earth. If God despises this wicked and sinful practice, certainly it ought not be done. Herein lies the question and controversy. Since God abhors and detests the action of men divorcing their faithful wives, is this still true and what are the consequences?  Let’s examine the issue of marriage, divorce and remarriage as the Bible speaks to and the Church today has responded.

First of all let’s talk about marriage. What is it? Well in simplicity, it is a formal joining together of one man and one woman in a spiritual, physical and social relationship to bring love, order and authority to what is called the “completed man,” or family unit. God the Father, from the beginning, sanctioned marriage for men and women, and so did God the Son,

Gen 2:23-24 (NLT)  “At last!” Adam exclaimed. “She is part of my own flesh and bone! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken out of a man.” 24 This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.

Mat 19:3-6 (NLT)  Some Pharisees came and tried to trap him with this question: “Should a man be allowed to divorce his wife for any reason?” 4 “Haven’t you read the Scriptures?” Jesus replied. “They record that from the beginning ‘God made them male and female.’ 5 And he said, ‘This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.’ 6 Since they are no longer two but one, let no one separate them, for God has joined them together.”

Indeed, it has always been God’s plan that a man and a woman marry and publicly announce their love in a “covenant” ceremony between God, society and themselves. Once done, God witnessing this covenant or commitment in the sight of all, these two people are join together in a “one flesh,” relationship. That meant they were to be seen and considered as one. The “one,” being the man who was created first. Yes, the woman was to be a social and spiritual part of him and his life and to share all his blessings, joys, satisfactions, and of course heartaches and disappointments too. Yet to live happily ever after, has not been the case since the beginning of time. In ancient Israel divorce became a common thing, even during the time of Moses. It was so abused, that God had to call for a public document acknowledging the breakup of a marriage in what was called a “bill of divorcement,” to protect the woman! We read of this in,

Deu 24:1-4 (NLT)  “Suppose a man marries a woman but later discovers something about her that is shameful. So he writes her a letter of divorce, gives it to her, and sends her away. 2 If she then leaves and marries another man 3 and the second husband also divorces her or dies, 4 the former husband may not marry her again, for she has been defiled. That would be detestable to the LORD. You must not bring guilt upon the land the LORD your God is giving you as a special possession.

Jesus commented on this “Mosaic Law,” providing for a woman to be given this “Divorce certificate,” when a marriage broke up. He said,

Mat 19:8 (NLT)  Jesus replied, “Moses permitted divorce as a concession to your hard-hearted wickedness, but it was not what God had originally intended.

In other words, the statement still stands, “GOD HATES DIVORCE!” Not that God hates the divorced, but the act, the idea, and the results that come to all who do and experience this. Friend, divorce has never been nor will it ever be something that God will say He likes, or approves of, except to say because we are sinners in words and deeds, when we sin particularly in the area of the flesh within marriage, God will accept it and attempt to make the best of it while here on earth. This action of God is not approval, but a concession for the sake of sinner’s safety and well-being, and societal order till all things are made right.

But how has the church responded to this? How shall we respond? The unsaved world around us today couldn’t care less about divorce or remarriage, they divorce and remarry as often as it pleases the sinful lusts and desires of people. Hollywood is an example. They marry and divorce as flies feed upon a dead carcass and move on to another in a non-ending fashion, a the secular world looks on with approval.

But friend, God sees and watches us and He abhors or HATES THE DIVORCE that is rampant among us. Do you know that the latest statistics seem to bear this out? Almost half the population of America is now or becoming divorced. The statistics within the professing Church aren’t much better! Just poll the average church and you will find that figure rapidly approaching similarity. How has the church responded? The answer is varying.

The average response in Bible believing Churches has been one of “intolerance.” Taking up on God’s explicit words and perhaps taking them out of context, the average church has no place for the divorced Christian. Often treated like “lepers,’ those who have suffered the trauma of divorce in their marital lives are kept at a distance in fellowship, and opportunities to serve the Lord who saved them. Being banned from any and all leadership roles of service, such couples and individuals as outcasts are tolerated at best. Therefore many of them drift from church to church hoping to find some acceptance, though rarely achieved. Additionally, many just end up staying away and deeply long for God’s acceptance and restoration.

Another response has been in review of the above attitudes and actions, the opposite is put into place. Some churches today have just about forgotten God’s Word on the matter of marriage and divorce. They accept anyone and everyone regardless of the circumstances, present or past, and offer such individuals every and any job and position within the church and its ministries with no questions asked. Such actions though defy God’s collective teachings, and create the same attitude God has towards the actions of divorce toward them. God hates or abhors and finds detestable a man or woman divorcing their spouses, and churches indiscriminately ignoring such immoral action or approving of it by default.

But now there’s a third option a bible believing church can take. It can stand with God and say divorce is a terrible thing. It is personal and public sin and the consequences of it are often lifelong and devastating for all. However, the Church is a saving station where those who find God in the Lord Jesus Christ, also are to find forgiveness and restitution. Those who have been divorced and have repented of such sin, clearly confessing it before God and society who witnessed the marital breakup, can be and shall be restored to full fellowship and service in the kingdom of God.

Now herein is the problem. How much service, and where can a divorced and or remarried Christian serve in the Church. For most fundamental groups the standard has been, in few or no places. By interpreting certain Scriptural texts, this standard for at least a century has determined that such saved sinners cannot serve in any leadership positions. The basis is said to come from two sections of New Testament Scripture. Let’s read them,

Mat 5:31-32 (NIV) – JESUS SPOKE:   “It has been said, ‘Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

1 Tim 3:2 (NIV )- PAUL THE APOSTLE WRITES:  Now the overseer must be above reproach, the husband of but one wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach,

Here then are the problem texts that traditionally have been interpreted as follows. Since God hates divorce and says if one carries out this action, they have sinned, they therefore remain in that state forever in the eyes of God. As a consequence, there can be no place of service in the church, especially leadership roles such as elder, deacon or teacher. So the church has either publicly or quietly banned these individuals whether they have confessed their sins or not. This phrase “the husband of one wife,” has plagued the church for centuries. What does it mean? Well there are three interpretations one can take. Let me share them with you,

1. A leader in the Church must have but one wife in his life - If he either divorces or remarries, he is disqualified for Paul states “the husband of one wife,” so that settles it. This has been a popular interpretation, but not a biblical interpretation of that phrase in the context it was given. The second is,

2. A leader must not be remarried after his wife’s death – Although a popular interpretation, we know Paul permitted remarriage for widows and widowers (1 Tim. 5:4; Rom. 7:2-3; Eph. 5:22-33). And, the third is,

3. A leader must not be a polygamist - That is, he must not have multiple wives as many did in the days of the First Century, and Old Testament times. Yes, many who came into the church as early new converts, often had multiple wives, slaves and concubines. Such continued lifestyles were not conducive to serving in Christian leadership positions. Hence, God word many feel stresses they were disqualified.

Now these are the three most popular views toward those who are saved but divorced and desire to come into the Church for service and fellowship. However, with no desire to simply or justify divorce or downplay God’s abhorrence for it, many sincere scholars have taken another look at the issue. In so doing, these long cherished but possibly legalistic views which have hung over the heads of divorced Christians “like clouds of darkness,” may be lifted. In so doing, a fourth interpretation has been considered of Paul’s requirements for leadership.

4. A leader must be an individual who has established at the time of consideration for such role, a life that exemplifies faithfulness to HIS PRESENT wife, family, and the principles of marriage, and sufficient time has passed to prove this emotional and spiritual example. Those who exegete this passage see it not as a reference to divorce at all, rather present walk with the Lord.

In such interpretation, being divorced is only an issue, if it is an unresolved and unconfessed sin, or entanglement, or proper restitution has not been made where possible, or moral weakness is evident. Apart from that, all sin can be and is forgiven the believer who confesses it, and God allows them to begin again in the kingdom of God just as if they have never sinned. This latter approach has merit, for the Bible reveals that Jesus received “all” who came to Him, and said the Father would in no way cast them out or treat them as second class citizen’s of His kingdom. In addition, Christ came to save sinners which included those who suffered divorce, and the only people He ever rejected were the religious self-rightous. Moreover, it is inconsistent, and illogical to say God forgives all sins but divorce. A man who is a murderer, sex-offender, rapist, thief, liar, or cheat, if such sins are sincerely confessed and paid for, he can serve in any leadership position, because God has forgiven them, but the divorced… well, they shall live with their sins and pay for them for all their earthly and possibly heavenly and eternal life!

Indeed, no issue stirs passionate controversy more in the local church than this issue of the subject of divorce and remarriage. However, I say it is enough that anyone who has made mistakes in their marriage and has gone through divorce deserves restitution when sincerely sought! Indeed, I don’t discount that many factors have to be considered and weighed carefully in granting anyone roles and leadership positions in the Church, but the fact remains, if God offers full forgiveness for our sins and promises to restore us, so ought the Body of Christ in the local assembly who represents Him!

Now no honest Christian takes divorce lightly, or justifies it for God abhors and hates it. No one can counsel divorce and say it is right. But the issue cannot and must not be ignored, and God’s people deserve to see this issue resolved with greater and or in depth exploration of this thorny issue.

Let’s face it too, many truly restored servants of the Lord usually are a tremendous credit to the Lord and His ministry. They have a sensitivity about the ravages of sin, and understanding of how serious it is and the consequences it brings; But, they can also serve with a sense of love and acceptance and understanding when it falls upon the sinner. I think congregations need to be open about this difficult issue and need to look again at all the biblical testimony in the full revelation of the Word on what it means to be a restored sinner. In so doing, it may bring healing and new opportunities of blessing to the individual, the church and society itself.

Now saying all that, if you are listening today -- know this. God loves sinners! Yes, God hates our sin, and He will also by “no means clear those guilty of it.” For God is holy and just, and He must therefore punish all sin and deal with those who commit it. Yet, the “Good News” of the Bible is God has found a way to not violate His holiness and justice, and thereby punish sin, but not the sinner who has committed it. Sound strange? Not really. You see God’s Word tells us that we are all sinners and stand in the need to be saved from the penalty of sin awaiting us. That penalty, friend, is physical and eternal death. We all know about the physical penalty, right, for all of us will die. But God warns after that, there is a spiritual penalty of eternal death called the SECOND DEATH! Once our soul and spirit is separated from our bodies (earthly death), God warns because of our sins, He must separate our soul and spirit from His presence, care, love, and provision for living for all eternity.

This “second death” comes immediately upon the first separation when the unsaved sinner at death, is cast into Hell to suffer for all eternity the “wages of their sins.” However, herein is the story of God’s love. God loves you my friend and me too! He proved this by coming to earth to die for our sins and be our legal substitute. You see, only a sinless and infinite Being could qualify to be such an acceptable exchange for the lives of all mankind. So God Himself in the Person and work of Jesus Christ, paid for our sins when He died on that cross 2000 years ago. The last words of the Savior were “It is finished.” Literally, the sin debt and penalty of all mankind is paid forever, in full! Yet, the truth is no one can ever have this “paid-for-debt” placed to their account in Heaven until…. until they receive Jesus Christ!

John 1:10-12 (NLT)  But although the world was made through him, the world didn’t recognize him when he came. 11 Even in his own land and among his own people, he was not accepted. 12 But to all who believed him and accepted him, he gave the right to become children of God.

John 6:47 (paraphrased)  “I assure you, [JESUS SAID]  anyone who believes in me already has the fullness of eternal life.

Acts 16:31 (NLT)  “Believe on the Lord Jesus and you will be saved, along with your entire household.”

Oh friend, God is in the saving and restoring business. That is what my message is all about, and when God saves He restores completely. God spoke and said,

Heb 10:17-18 (NLT)  “I will never again remember their sins and lawless deeds.” 18 Now when sins have been forgiven, there is no need to offer any more sacrifices.

That friend is true Christianity, and anything less is not. Thanks be to God we all can be saved from whatever mess we’ve made of life, whatever rejection and rebellion we’ve committed against God - all can be forgiven “if” we repent and confess our sins and call upon Jesus Christ to be our sin-bearing Savior and God. Say friend have you so repented? Have you confessed you are a sinner and that you’ve sinned against God and others? Have you genuinely been remorseful of it and with God’s help are you willing to not only confess it to God and those whom you’ve wronged, and where possible, are you willing to surrender your heart and life to Jesus so He might live righteously through you henceforth now and forever?

All who do become children of God and experience the freedom such forgiveness brings. May God add His blessings to all these words for Jesus sake. Amen…

---